The following post comes with a warning. It is ranty, it contains swearing and I say some things which might be offensive to some. You've been warned.... The Don'ts....
Don't make me wait 20 minutes for a coffee and then tell me it is my fault for having two numbers on the table. If you are two thick to work it out, then don't work in a café. Indeed, I would suggest you just don't, because you are probably too stupid to breathe, let alone breed.
Don't run a café on New Years Day that is staffed by imbeciles. If you want to open and take people's money, pay some good staff. If the best that you can scrape up are the café world equivalent of Frank Spencer, then just don't.
Don't bring me my coffee last, when you know I have been waiting 20 minutes and have asked AGAIN. Use some smarts, divert one of the flat white coffees from someone else to me. Bringing the people who arrived at my table 10 minutes after me, their food and coffee first, really does not make me feel good about you. (Oh wait, you are too stupid to realise that aren't you...)
Don't employ the equivalent of primordial sludge to make coffee. He's slow, incompetent and really doesn't give a shit.
Don't sit on the same old look for 20 million years. Redecorate your café you fricken dorks. (ok I will admit that last one is nothing to do with New Years Day, but I am pissed off and it does look very dated and shite in there)
I hate shit service and I especially hate it in cafés. Roasted Addiqtion did an amazing job of really just making the whole café experience rubbish on New Years Day and I am still appalled. In future I would rather drink instant, than give them a cent. When I reflect how much time and effort we put into customer service where I work and how much of a bagging public servants get for the smallest things, I am not prepared to put up with crap like I experienced there.
Poor form Roasted Addiqtion in Kingsland. Poor form.